Going Beyond New Year’s Resolutions to Create Change
Love is a carrier wave. It can take you onto many paths and great distances that you have yet to imagine because you can’t see that far or in that many directions. For me, this year, 2018, is the year of great openings and new paths.
Life for me has been quite a joy ride and a roller coaster one at that. It has taken many years for me to reach a position where I am about to pivot greatly and soar tremendously in my life and I am truly excited to finally reach this place in my life.
How to Pivot for Big Changes?
Do we face change with trepidation or with excitement? This is the question we all face when we consider what is before us based only on what we know, where we are, and what we have. In other words, we base our considerations of the future on how we feel in this very moment within our current state of circumstances.
If we don’t like our reality as it is today, then our future presents a commitment to change and for the positive (expansion). However, it can also go the other way: the negative (contraction) if we consider our future from the prism of our failures and past dismal memories — expecting the status quo of the same ol’ same old.
Rearview Mirror Expectations Hold Us Back
If viewed from this rearview mirror, the future doesn’t seem as bright as it could be. It can actually seem quite pessimistic. It is sad that most of us tend to view our future horizon as dim and dark — our enthusiasm and desire to move into the unknown dampened by our minds running us down memory lane. It is only our ego minds that tell us we have no choices: To deviate and pivot elsewhere is dangerous and to be avoided at all costs.
Inner Voices Hold Us Back – “At least I tried.”
Just like a vinyl record on a turntable, or a rotunda, our lives are circumspect, meaning that we experience our moments of reality in an arc. Our paths are circular as we move through cycles of time, both personal and seasonal. And like the needle tracing out the grooves in the record, we live out our daily lives moving to our internal rhythms that are already attuned to the natural movements of the Universe: our current NOW set to new music emitting forth from within us against the background of memories past. To resist this natural expansive spiraling movement is akin to playing a scratched record with the needle stuck in a groove, repeating the same piece of music over and over again.
Resist the Resistance to Move On
This is what we must counter — the resistance that emerges as we try to move forward into the unknown terrain of 2018. How can we find the opening that leads us into our new state of circumstances if we are facing away from the door, away from the circumference edge of our comfort zone, looking only at the familiar and recognizable? We reassure ourselves, “What will be is what has always been and will continue to be as long as we stay here where we know what to do and how to be. Status quo is good.”
We warm ourselves with these thoughts while we make our New Year’s Resolution and set bodacious goals for 2018, comfortable with the statistic that most people fail and/or discontinue their New Year’s Resolution. And to the few that actually achieve and maintain their New Year’s Resolutions, we concede that they are far stronger in resolve than we will ever be. And so we console ourselves down the road when we give up, with the standard, “At least I tried.”
Fuel the Desire to Change
To counter resistance, one must have an overpowering impetus towards change. You must want to change more than you want to be safe and comfortable.
The question one needs to ask is not what do I want to change now, but more importantly: where do I want to be next year at this exact time and moment in the future.
This is a key question because we advance our lives by changing our circumstances, not by the desires, emotions, and impulses we feel in the moment. These revised circumstances are tactical to how we go about implementing the change; however, that awareness is needed only after we develop our intention, “Where do I want to be in one year, what does that state of circumstances look and feel like?”
If you approach your New Year’s Resolution as the “opening” — the window (or door) of opportunity to create a new state of circumstances, then you are advancing naturally in sync with where the Universe is already moving you serendipitously. You see, your circumstances change continually and consistently whether you are aware of it or not and whether you agree with it or not, because “change is constant”. What dots most of us fail to connect is that what actually changes is our state of circumstances, our “reality”; therefore, where we are this year, this very moment in time, will not be the same at this exact moment in the future, one year from now. You will change. That is guaranteed!
Grab Control of Change: Turn the Corner with Intention
With intention, you control where you end up, by virtue of your free will. However, your ego, which has difficulty navigating the unknown and is therefore more comfortable with status quo, will put up resistance because it wants a guaranteed (known) outcome. It needs to know ahead of time that this New Year’s Resolution effort you are putting in will have a payout at the end. The rub is that your mind, linear as it is, cannot see around the corner at what is yet to come; all it can see is the crosswalk at the edge of the sidewalk, not realizing that advancement is around the corner, not directly ahead. Because of your ego’s limited tunnel vision, fearful scenarios that you could be hit by unseen oncoming traffic if you continued walking in this new direction fills your mind, causing you to pause.
Commit to Small and Large Changes
The way to succeed at a New Year’s Resolution is to recognize that when you willingly commit to change with an intention to expand your life for the better — a positive, not negative, change to your current state of circumstances, you set into motion in your life the forces of change aligned to Love. And just like stretching pizza dough, each positive commitment to change, whether it is to lose weight, forge new relationships, save money, change jobs, hug your children, or (you fill in the blank _________), enlarges your current state of circumstances. You get a bigger pizza, more toppings.
Eventually, one year from now, you will notice your ability to contain more, do more, and be more, has increased — with the evidence of this new confidence of stepping out into the unknown now seen as additional toppings on your now super-sized pizza of life. You are now one of the few who have not only tried at making a New Year’s Resolution, but also succeeded at it!
How Do I Know This Works?
I had a dream a several years back when I was in a dismal state of life. I was extremely unhappy with where I was: broke, depressed, sick, and going nowhere. My circumstances were not satisfactory to say the least!
In my dream, there was no pizza but instead, there was a door. I was in the dark where I couldn’t see anything. Then a door opened in front of me and I realized I was in a room, the basement. As the door opened, behind it, I could see light illuminating a set of steps against a wall going upward. Bemused, I watched the door open and didn’t move. The dream went away. Upon reflection, I realized I had missed my opening to evolve into a new state of circumstances. Having not taken the opportunity the Universe handed me, I ended up taking another turn around the rotunda of same ol’ same ol’ — status quo. That year, I experienced the same dismal reality as the year before.
A year later, the same dream appeared again, identical in detail. However, this time, when the opening appeared, I didn’t hesitate. I dove through the door, ran up the stairs, and never looked back. I am happy to report that my life has never been the same since.
What will you do when your opening appears this year?
Abigail Diaz Juan, global citizen, entrepreneur, Sherpa guide and author, presents a revolutionary approach to re-discovering the self, re-defining the way life is meant to be lived, and revitalizing personal potential and purpose. With an emphasis on using fear as a transformative experience and trust as propulsion, her book, How Me Found I: Mastering the Art of Pivoting Gracefully Through Life, equips readers with the necessary skills to turn moments of negativity into opportunities for spiritual development, personal empowerment, and ultimate fulfillment in life as they move forward toward their desired and natural reality. As founder of the Diamond Quest Company, Abby assists others in walking their own paths to greatness as a natural person. Visit her online at www.mydiamondquest.net or on her Facebook page.